is captured well by my friend Jason Evans here.
I too have been spending time at the temporary winter shelter at our church for the past month. And I haven't written about it, even though there are certainly reasons I should have. You would love to know that my church here took a risk and plunged into service to "the least of these" brothers and sisters: men and women who've been making a life on the streets. You would get a kick out of some of our conversations and you would be touched by the stories we share and you would be irritated by people's quirks. That's all part of the experience, but I feel rather strongly that I don't always have the privilege of putting other people's stories on display. As Jason writes, "this isn't simply a project; it is the names and faces of those that are our guests"-- and I would add, those that are our friends.
However, I can (and should) tell you the details of the project. For 6 weeks, First Presbyterian Church of San Diego has provided space and supervision for 8-12 guests to sleep each night. Individuals who had contact with the church and its other outreach ministries applied and were accepted for the duration of the program, so that it's the same little group that has become a family of sorts, night by night. Each guest puts up and takes down his or her air mattress bed each night, and volunteers from churches around the city take shifts-- hanging out and sharing food in the evenings, cleaning up and clearing the room in the mornings. This was prompted by conviction about our responsibility as a downtown faith community, in the face of uncertainty about whether the city would provide space for a larger shelter during the damp winter months. There was a protracted process that culminated in setting up a large tent for housing-- I hear it's a pretty awful place to stay. I should add that it wasn't easy for the church to make this decision, either. It was a risk, and not everyone felt we were up to the task.
The question that may be lingering for you now might be "Well, is it working?" I don't know. We've lost a couple of the original guests, which was probably bound to happen. If they miss two nights, they are no longer eligible for the shelter. One couple sings in the church choir every Sunday morning. Each person is really quite endearing, but that doesn't mean there's a clear path to anything remotely close to "fixing" his or her life. People are stubborn and people have problems. People try hard and people have lots of potential. All of this is true of you and me, and it's true of the guests at First Pres. We've got a few more weeks; I'll post some more thoughts along the way.
Now that I've blogged and pondered, I suppose that what I'm trying to say is that I'm navigating what I want to say, what has meaning, and what needs to be shared. The people person that I am just wants to plunge into the stories. And never fear, I still believe there are stories to be told! Sometimes, though, I think I need to take a step back and wait a moment to choose a lens that is honorable and just and true and worthy of praise. I'm learning as I go.
Showing posts with label doings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label doings. Show all posts
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
The Ant and the Worm at City College
I went down to City College today for the weekly prayer meeting with the InterVarsity chapter there. The semester I've spent getting to know just a tiny bit about 'City' has been full of encounters. Not long and not necessarily deep, but often these are the kinds of encounters and passers-by that leave a strong impression. Today was no different. I spoke briefly with a woman getting people to sign a petition about the San Diego school board. She did not come across as a particularly strong advocate, chirping softly at those of us who walked by: "Are you a registered San Diego voter?" Peppered with occasional comments like, "Voting is an American freedom." One man responded gruffly, "I'm a convict. Can't vote."
Later, a student I've interacted with before hopped over a wall and exclaimed, "Habits sure are hard to kick."
[me]: Um, yeah, they can be.
Student: Chew.
...?...
-I should stop chewing and spitting.
-Oh. Yeah. Gross. (I see the wad in his lower lip now.) You know how terrible that is, right?
-Yeah, I'm going to stop. My girlfriend - soon-to-be-girlfriend - is sick right now.
-Sorry to hear that--
-She has a UTI. So when she's better...
-(In my head: I don't want to know!!!) Well are your classes going okay?
-Except math, yes. I think I'll stay pre-med, but I'll just have to see if that's how God wants to use me... Well, I'll see you later! Hug! Bye!
There was the usual mix of activity on the quad: Spanish-speaking soccer players, cell phone conversations, shouted interactions from sidewalk to sidewalk, people enjoying the sunshine, students rushing to class. Surrounded by all this, we laid out our blankets and started prayer time with a little scripture study. The student leader I've been supporting through the semester led a time of reading and reflecting on the passage where Jesus prays for his disciples, and she reminded the 6 of us gathered about Jesus' prayer that extends to US ("all those who will believe because of [the disciples'] message"). We took time to pray together for friends and classmates, people around us for whom God cares.
While we prayed, I kept my eyes open. You know, on the lookout for leaping students, errant soccer balls, and latecomers to our open-air prayer meeting. You just never know. In addition to all of the above coming our way, what really caught my attention today, though, was a small encounter. There in the grass by my foot was an ant struggling mightily, flopping back and forth. I tried not to be too obviously distracted as I leaned in to look more closely. This ant was trying to PULL a small caterpillar/ grub/ worm-thing-- to drag him somewhere. What is he, crazy? I thought. Why, and how, and why not get help? Lots of other ants scurried around, but none of the others seemed to think that lending 6 legs to the worm-transport effort was a good idea. In the meantime, I prayed and listened as others prayed. At one point I looked back to the ant-worm fiasco to find that the ant had left, given up. Strangely, I felt sad. After some 15 minutes of tugging and re-positioning, the ant had moved on.
Wanting to be attentive, but not over-sensitive, I wondered why it was sad for a ridiculously small insect to abandon a gargantuan and questionable task. I wondered if God was saying anything. I wondered if I've (metaphorically) been an ant or a worm or a distracted onlooker. I wondered what gives an ant the imagination to think, sure, I'll give this a try. And what does the floppy grub-worm think about it all?
At City College, the encounters are often a little weird. And ministry can seem a bit improbable. My prayer, however, is that Jesus and his fumbling fisher-folk disciples would remind and instruct us to give it a try. Whether we are tugged or tugging, let us take heart at the good news and the Lord's favor.
Later, a student I've interacted with before hopped over a wall and exclaimed, "Habits sure are hard to kick."
[me]: Um, yeah, they can be.
Student: Chew.
...?...
-I should stop chewing and spitting.
-Oh. Yeah. Gross. (I see the wad in his lower lip now.) You know how terrible that is, right?
-Yeah, I'm going to stop. My girlfriend - soon-to-be-girlfriend - is sick right now.
-Sorry to hear that--
-She has a UTI. So when she's better...
-(In my head: I don't want to know!!!) Well are your classes going okay?
-Except math, yes. I think I'll stay pre-med, but I'll just have to see if that's how God wants to use me... Well, I'll see you later! Hug! Bye!
There was the usual mix of activity on the quad: Spanish-speaking soccer players, cell phone conversations, shouted interactions from sidewalk to sidewalk, people enjoying the sunshine, students rushing to class. Surrounded by all this, we laid out our blankets and started prayer time with a little scripture study. The student leader I've been supporting through the semester led a time of reading and reflecting on the passage where Jesus prays for his disciples, and she reminded the 6 of us gathered about Jesus' prayer that extends to US ("all those who will believe because of [the disciples'] message"). We took time to pray together for friends and classmates, people around us for whom God cares.
While we prayed, I kept my eyes open. You know, on the lookout for leaping students, errant soccer balls, and latecomers to our open-air prayer meeting. You just never know. In addition to all of the above coming our way, what really caught my attention today, though, was a small encounter. There in the grass by my foot was an ant struggling mightily, flopping back and forth. I tried not to be too obviously distracted as I leaned in to look more closely. This ant was trying to PULL a small caterpillar/ grub/ worm-thing-- to drag him somewhere. What is he, crazy? I thought. Why, and how, and why not get help? Lots of other ants scurried around, but none of the others seemed to think that lending 6 legs to the worm-transport effort was a good idea. In the meantime, I prayed and listened as others prayed. At one point I looked back to the ant-worm fiasco to find that the ant had left, given up. Strangely, I felt sad. After some 15 minutes of tugging and re-positioning, the ant had moved on.
Wanting to be attentive, but not over-sensitive, I wondered why it was sad for a ridiculously small insect to abandon a gargantuan and questionable task. I wondered if God was saying anything. I wondered if I've (metaphorically) been an ant or a worm or a distracted onlooker. I wondered what gives an ant the imagination to think, sure, I'll give this a try. And what does the floppy grub-worm think about it all?
At City College, the encounters are often a little weird. And ministry can seem a bit improbable. My prayer, however, is that Jesus and his fumbling fisher-folk disciples would remind and instruct us to give it a try. Whether we are tugged or tugging, let us take heart at the good news and the Lord's favor.
Monday, November 8, 2010
A Good Day
Drizzly early morning. Delicious green tea. Dry autumn afternoon. Dear, precious friends.
Yet, what makes me pronounce the day a 'good one' is balance and scale, a sense of completeness and permission for unanswered questions. In work and in leisure, this day let me flex and stretch and enjoy.
I woke up early to work on translation of a small portion of a report on violations of indigenous people's rights in Peru. I don't claim significance or even particular skill in doing it-- just a few pages of English translation to help a friend.
Running late, I hurried across the dripping drying streets of City Heights to join a friend for some Bible study. We asked questions and enjoyed insights from Acts 1-- final words on Judas, casting lots, and filling the apostolic leader board. We let God do new things, show us fresh flicks and twirls of the Holy Spirit through the ages, and furrow our brows on things we thought we knew. We prayed together.
I came back home for a ripe mango with lunch. I dialed in for an Urban Mosaic conference call. We updated one another, asked questions, and prayed for work and life.
I dealt with a few dozen emails. I added things to my to-do list without crossing anything off. I biked over to some friends' apartment, visited, hurried home before the early dusk. I made dinner with a former roommate on the phone; I washed the dishes while catching up with a dear former co-worker.
My day spanned 2 continents. Touched people in 5 cities. Bridged macro, micro and meso scales. It doesn't make me a superstar - it just makes me happy. It particularly makes me content that this is who I am and what I do. Today. (Ha, remind me in a few weeks that I wrote this. I'll need the refresher.)
For those of you who believe in me and what God's invited me into, I thought often in the later part of the day that you should know what this is like. What a privilege and joy, what a beautiful invitation to say, yes, God is doing a new thing. A new thing in Christ's bride, the Church. A new thing springing forth from the desert. A light in the dark. A brightness for worn city streets. A day that is varied and smooth and very good.
Yet, what makes me pronounce the day a 'good one' is balance and scale, a sense of completeness and permission for unanswered questions. In work and in leisure, this day let me flex and stretch and enjoy.
I woke up early to work on translation of a small portion of a report on violations of indigenous people's rights in Peru. I don't claim significance or even particular skill in doing it-- just a few pages of English translation to help a friend.
Running late, I hurried across the dripping drying streets of City Heights to join a friend for some Bible study. We asked questions and enjoyed insights from Acts 1-- final words on Judas, casting lots, and filling the apostolic leader board. We let God do new things, show us fresh flicks and twirls of the Holy Spirit through the ages, and furrow our brows on things we thought we knew. We prayed together.
I came back home for a ripe mango with lunch. I dialed in for an Urban Mosaic conference call. We updated one another, asked questions, and prayed for work and life.
I dealt with a few dozen emails. I added things to my to-do list without crossing anything off. I biked over to some friends' apartment, visited, hurried home before the early dusk. I made dinner with a former roommate on the phone; I washed the dishes while catching up with a dear former co-worker.
My day spanned 2 continents. Touched people in 5 cities. Bridged macro, micro and meso scales. It doesn't make me a superstar - it just makes me happy. It particularly makes me content that this is who I am and what I do. Today. (Ha, remind me in a few weeks that I wrote this. I'll need the refresher.)
For those of you who believe in me and what God's invited me into, I thought often in the later part of the day that you should know what this is like. What a privilege and joy, what a beautiful invitation to say, yes, God is doing a new thing. A new thing in Christ's bride, the Church. A new thing springing forth from the desert. A light in the dark. A brightness for worn city streets. A day that is varied and smooth and very good.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Today's Workload
Friday, October 29, 2010
Canoeing Mountains
This was the premise of a training event I just attended here in San Diego. Solid insights from a pastor and strategic thinker.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Life Humming, Blog Sputtering
The sun slides down to quietly close another day. The weather is phenomenal-- I can almost imagine the dry air is part of autumn. Palm trees mess up that image, but oh well.
Another day, and my to-do list still looms. Instead of becoming the rare event of the month, it's now common to have several days a week completely full of meetings: churches, pastors, co-workers, friends. Planning, praying, talking, exploring. Here are some of the things on the docket (and my HOPE is to offer deeper profiles and information for you in future posts)----
-City College, with InterVarsity
-Third Avenue Charitable Organization (TACO)
-City Heights charter school & community center
-Bible study with some other young women nearby
-planning & leading a weekend prayer retreat
-supporting leadership at 2 local Presbyterian churches
Continuing to watch some irons in the fire: in Tijuana, at a local hospital, and with the Global Urban Trek. And renewing my energy for raising the financial support to keep it all going!
Another day, and my to-do list still looms. Instead of becoming the rare event of the month, it's now common to have several days a week completely full of meetings: churches, pastors, co-workers, friends. Planning, praying, talking, exploring. Here are some of the things on the docket (and my HOPE is to offer deeper profiles and information for you in future posts)----
-City College, with InterVarsity
-Third Avenue Charitable Organization (TACO)
-City Heights charter school & community center
-Bible study with some other young women nearby
-planning & leading a weekend prayer retreat
-supporting leadership at 2 local Presbyterian churches
Continuing to watch some irons in the fire: in Tijuana, at a local hospital, and with the Global Urban Trek. And renewing my energy for raising the financial support to keep it all going!
Friday, May 7, 2010
Ears to Hear
I have my share of feeling fear, annoyance and confusion when I'm around people who are homeless, addicted, or unstable. I question their judgment and their motives. I'm always ready for things to take a turn into nonsense. Rightly or wrongly, it keeps me from being too shocked when the winds shift. When things start sounding weird, I can hold myself back and say, Okay, this person's a little off.
What I was reminded of today, though, was the no-nonsense insight that often comes from people who live on the edges of society. This was the second Friday I've gone downtown and helped with a morning meal for the homeless. It was a vibrant experience.
This morning some people on the streets reminded me that I love people. As I took trays of food to individuals on the church patio, one lady began trying to ask me a question in broken English. When I skipped into Spanish with her, a big grin broke out on her face. Oh such relief! I described how the process worked and later she got a meal. She thanked me again and again. Every time I passed, she smiled. Whether sweet Rosie who claimed she'd "never forget" me or Tom who reads the Harry Potter books or tough Lisa who grumbles and smiles or Dax who makes jokes and talks about his granddaughter-- I enjoyed people this morning. We all found big or small reasons to smile.
I smile at the way these friends told the truth. Some walked up to me and asked if I was Irish. Some told me I look 17 years old. (Ouch.) One sang me a love song. One told me it was okay to serve the Lord by having conversation with people in the courtyard-- hoping I didn't "get in trouble" with the other volunteers for talking instead of clearing tables. One told me not to stop smiling.
It was the way Tom, Dax, Rosie and others looked straight at me and said what they thought-- that made me think about the repeated times in Luke when Jesus talks about those who have ears to hear. Jesus says something that invites those who have ears to hear-- listen! Immediately, the spotlight turns to this unruly bunch called "tax collectors and sinners" and puts them in a scene hanging out with Jesus. This crowd is bumping into the Kingdom. They hear what's true. They know it. They say it.
In community development and church outreach circles lately I've been praying for us (usually middle-class, well-meaning people) to have God's eyes for neighborhoods here-- "eyes to see." What I've thought less about are the people who offer US their seeing eyes and their hearing ears. And not just what they hear on the streets that we're interested in, but what they hear in us. What they hear from Jesus.
At those fun gatherings around Jesus 2,000 years ago, the ones listening didn't cease to be tax collectors and sinners, but they stopped being left out of the conversation. They became a crucial part of good news listened-to and understood.
People without houses, people without money, and people without clear minds don't cease to be people with problems in the presence of Jesus. Yet, they can be people with ears to hear his voice and his truth. In their listening, and our listening with them, we could all be people of promise.
What I was reminded of today, though, was the no-nonsense insight that often comes from people who live on the edges of society. This was the second Friday I've gone downtown and helped with a morning meal for the homeless. It was a vibrant experience.
This morning some people on the streets reminded me that I love people. As I took trays of food to individuals on the church patio, one lady began trying to ask me a question in broken English. When I skipped into Spanish with her, a big grin broke out on her face. Oh such relief! I described how the process worked and later she got a meal. She thanked me again and again. Every time I passed, she smiled. Whether sweet Rosie who claimed she'd "never forget" me or Tom who reads the Harry Potter books or tough Lisa who grumbles and smiles or Dax who makes jokes and talks about his granddaughter-- I enjoyed people this morning. We all found big or small reasons to smile.
I smile at the way these friends told the truth. Some walked up to me and asked if I was Irish. Some told me I look 17 years old. (Ouch.) One sang me a love song. One told me it was okay to serve the Lord by having conversation with people in the courtyard-- hoping I didn't "get in trouble" with the other volunteers for talking instead of clearing tables. One told me not to stop smiling.
It was the way Tom, Dax, Rosie and others looked straight at me and said what they thought-- that made me think about the repeated times in Luke when Jesus talks about those who have ears to hear. Jesus says something that invites those who have ears to hear-- listen! Immediately, the spotlight turns to this unruly bunch called "tax collectors and sinners" and puts them in a scene hanging out with Jesus. This crowd is bumping into the Kingdom. They hear what's true. They know it. They say it.
In community development and church outreach circles lately I've been praying for us (usually middle-class, well-meaning people) to have God's eyes for neighborhoods here-- "eyes to see." What I've thought less about are the people who offer US their seeing eyes and their hearing ears. And not just what they hear on the streets that we're interested in, but what they hear in us. What they hear from Jesus.
At those fun gatherings around Jesus 2,000 years ago, the ones listening didn't cease to be tax collectors and sinners, but they stopped being left out of the conversation. They became a crucial part of good news listened-to and understood.
People without houses, people without money, and people without clear minds don't cease to be people with problems in the presence of Jesus. Yet, they can be people with ears to hear his voice and his truth. In their listening, and our listening with them, we could all be people of promise.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Godly Cancellations
I took a chunk of time on Tuesday for prayer, study and reflection, and one of the driving factors (other than the fact that those are all good things to do) was that I wanted to be more in tune with God's direction for my days. I like to work hard and be productive, and as a result I am very capable of filling a schedule until I feel busy and accomplished. I've done much too good a job of this lately.
In the two days since, plans and meetings have cancelled right and left, and it's been beautiful. That's right: beautiful. Though I am sad that I didn't get to see 5 or 6 wonderful people, each cancellation opened me to something else, and in that, God gave me joy and freedom.
For example, on Thursdays I have a weekly meeting at the doughnut shop around the corner with a college student I'm helping to prepare for a summer in Mexico City. I had done reading and prepared some scripture study in Amos for that meeting, and so I could have been grouchy when a text came through saying he wouldn't make it -- feeling sick. Instead, there was a sense of openness, like , Okay, how will this morning go now?
It went by tackling a few little projects, having a fantastic conversation and time of prayer with a roommate, and slowing down the pace of the rest of my day. Mmmm. As much as I would have savored a string of meetings and "tasks accomplished," this is sweeter.
May God bring you the pace that you need and the peace that you seek, today and every day.
In the two days since, plans and meetings have cancelled right and left, and it's been beautiful. That's right: beautiful. Though I am sad that I didn't get to see 5 or 6 wonderful people, each cancellation opened me to something else, and in that, God gave me joy and freedom.
For example, on Thursdays I have a weekly meeting at the doughnut shop around the corner with a college student I'm helping to prepare for a summer in Mexico City. I had done reading and prepared some scripture study in Amos for that meeting, and so I could have been grouchy when a text came through saying he wouldn't make it -- feeling sick. Instead, there was a sense of openness, like , Okay, how will this morning go now?
It went by tackling a few little projects, having a fantastic conversation and time of prayer with a roommate, and slowing down the pace of the rest of my day. Mmmm. As much as I would have savored a string of meetings and "tasks accomplished," this is sweeter.
May God bring you the pace that you need and the peace that you seek, today and every day.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Week in the Life
I've realized how much of the blog lately has been REFLECTIVE, so I figured I'd put a little concrete update in here for those of you who want to know what the heck I do everyday. While I don't have any kind of a typical day, maybe a glance at the whole week will help!
My week in review:
Sunday- 7.(something) mile run with neighbor! Church with First Presbyterian. Led prayer walk in City Heights for local church. Joined CRM missional community folks for dinner and prayer and discussion.
Monday- inductive Bible study with a friend, digging into 1 John. So many good questions there! Then Tijuana boys' home for conversation, hanging out, talking about surfing, taking the kids to school. Took about 2 hours to cross the border back into the US; a man just ahead of me in line got taken away in handcuffs. I came home, cooked dinner, and watched a bilingual film ("English as a Second Language") about the emptiness of life on the border.
Tuesday- got up and started going through emails when I got a call from a college friend I hadn't talked to in 6+ months! We talked 'till I had to get ready for my weekly check-in meeting with Geoff. Geoff and I caught up, pondering God in daily life and the balance between being involved in lots of great things and a restful availability (ie: not being crazy busy). Another long-overdue conversation with a college friend, and then with my family. Bought plane tickets for our CRM world staff conference in Malaysia!!!
Wednesday- Weekly staff meeting with other CRM folks in San Diego, discussing Mansions of the Heart (spiritual formation based on Theresa of Avila's writings). MARATHON emailing session to get my inbox in order. (Sorry if I owe you an email, I've been backlogged lately as I spend lots of time looking for plane tickets in Asia.) Bible study with roommates and some architectures students downtown. Matthew 12 and Revelation 7. Weird stuff.
Thursday- full day in Fullerton (Orange County). Drove up for a roundtable discussion/ workshop with other community development practitioners weaving together expertise of City-Reaching (master networkers), Community Development (local organizer- neighbor ministry types), and Prayer/ Intercessors (the people who love to pray). Great discussions and fun people to meet. Then swung by the CRM office in Anaheim to catch up and wait out rush hour traffic. Played with friends' baby boy. Got home and went out for Vietnamese food and gourmet dessert with apartment #1 neighbors-- I'm still full!
Friday- another early morning-- chopping vegetables to feed homeless/ low-income folks downtown. Meeting with local church plant about community center planning and prayer.
And on and on! And those are just the highlights! I'm sure I'm missing various fun nuggets of life and ministry in there, but if you want to know more, just holler and I'll fill you in. =)
My week in review:
Sunday- 7.(something) mile run with neighbor! Church with First Presbyterian. Led prayer walk in City Heights for local church. Joined CRM missional community folks for dinner and prayer and discussion.
Monday- inductive Bible study with a friend, digging into 1 John. So many good questions there! Then Tijuana boys' home for conversation, hanging out, talking about surfing, taking the kids to school. Took about 2 hours to cross the border back into the US; a man just ahead of me in line got taken away in handcuffs. I came home, cooked dinner, and watched a bilingual film ("English as a Second Language") about the emptiness of life on the border.
Tuesday- got up and started going through emails when I got a call from a college friend I hadn't talked to in 6+ months! We talked 'till I had to get ready for my weekly check-in meeting with Geoff. Geoff and I caught up, pondering God in daily life and the balance between being involved in lots of great things and a restful availability (ie: not being crazy busy). Another long-overdue conversation with a college friend, and then with my family. Bought plane tickets for our CRM world staff conference in Malaysia!!!
Wednesday- Weekly staff meeting with other CRM folks in San Diego, discussing Mansions of the Heart (spiritual formation based on Theresa of Avila's writings). MARATHON emailing session to get my inbox in order. (Sorry if I owe you an email, I've been backlogged lately as I spend lots of time looking for plane tickets in Asia.) Bible study with roommates and some architectures students downtown. Matthew 12 and Revelation 7. Weird stuff.
Thursday- full day in Fullerton (Orange County). Drove up for a roundtable discussion/ workshop with other community development practitioners weaving together expertise of City-Reaching (master networkers), Community Development (local organizer- neighbor ministry types), and Prayer/ Intercessors (the people who love to pray). Great discussions and fun people to meet. Then swung by the CRM office in Anaheim to catch up and wait out rush hour traffic. Played with friends' baby boy. Got home and went out for Vietnamese food and gourmet dessert with apartment #1 neighbors-- I'm still full!
Friday- another early morning-- chopping vegetables to feed homeless/ low-income folks downtown. Meeting with local church plant about community center planning and prayer.
And on and on! And those are just the highlights! I'm sure I'm missing various fun nuggets of life and ministry in there, but if you want to know more, just holler and I'll fill you in. =)
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Joan's Palms on Sunday
If I told this story
you would worry
say "stay safe"
"carry pepper spray"
to stop it
stop her.
Was it
dangerous?
Danger of soft pillowed hands
filled with warmth of life
and sun and scraping by
and scrapping on the street.
Warm under waving palms,
this is no royal procession:
smells and scenes of rejection
men and women who want food
no flimsy 'bread of life'
but a hearty soup.
It is all backdrop to a bruised and limping plea:
"Got a quarter? Or a dollar?"
No, but we can get food
if you want?
"Oh yes!"
Handshake introduction:
"Joan."
Laura.
Civilized and safe
until despairing strength pulls me in
too close
my hands wound in hers
and here is danger
close as a whisper-sob
of jibbered fear:
"the police don't understand."
I have to pull away
from the insane harm
and helpless hurt
in her hands.
I hate to
have to
let her go
admit defeat
and fear.
Walking away was right?
But Joan's babbled yells
were no consolation
no checkmark
for a task completed.
It is this uncertain
mess of conscience
pepper spray would not
ameliorate.
It is this day of significance
warming me up to
full absurdity of royal parade
led by a donkey.
Danger and bruises and hands and holiness,
wrapped in palms this Sunday,
invite me to tell a story
that repeats.
you would worry
say "stay safe"
"carry pepper spray"
to stop it
stop her.
Was it
dangerous?
Danger of soft pillowed hands
filled with warmth of life
and sun and scraping by
and scrapping on the street.
Warm under waving palms,
this is no royal procession:
smells and scenes of rejection
men and women who want food
no flimsy 'bread of life'
but a hearty soup.
It is all backdrop to a bruised and limping plea:
"Got a quarter? Or a dollar?"
No, but we can get food
if you want?
"Oh yes!"
Handshake introduction:
"Joan."
Laura.
Civilized and safe
until despairing strength pulls me in
too close
my hands wound in hers
and here is danger
close as a whisper-sob
of jibbered fear:
"the police don't understand."
I have to pull away
from the insane harm
and helpless hurt
in her hands.
I hate to
have to
let her go
admit defeat
and fear.
Walking away was right?
But Joan's babbled yells
were no consolation
no checkmark
for a task completed.
It is this uncertain
mess of conscience
pepper spray would not
ameliorate.
It is this day of significance
warming me up to
full absurdity of royal parade
led by a donkey.
Danger and bruises and hands and holiness,
wrapped in palms this Sunday,
invite me to tell a story
that repeats.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Generate Hope
I've crossed paths with people pioneering a brand new non-profit called Generate Hope that's confronting the grim reality of sex-trafficking in San Diego. Here's a glimpse into a little-known aspect of this sunny city, from an interview as their first women's safehouse opened last week.
There's not much commentary for me to add... I am grateful for organizations like this one offering aid for a gaping need. I feel strongly about the Church's responsibility to step up in the face of grim, stark realities like this. I reflect on yesterday's sermon on Jonah, in which the preacher firmly argued that, "Our disobedience is the world's catastrophe." Our failure-- and even refusal-- as the Church to engage a society that craves power, exploitation and literally cheap sex is disobedience. And it is catastrophe. Every individual actor in the sex trade screams for love, for ministry, for the light of Jesus. Of course we feel compassion for the women entering recovery. But what about the larger, frightening, disgusting system? Are some of them our Ninevites? The johns, the pimps, the gangs, the accomplices, the abusers who made that little girl feel unsafe? Imagine a world in which THEY were healed as well. Imagine a world where that resounding catastrophe could be replaced by hope.
It's a miracle, but one we've seen before: out of dark, wounded, belly-of-a-whale depths, hope comes.
There's not much commentary for me to add... I am grateful for organizations like this one offering aid for a gaping need. I feel strongly about the Church's responsibility to step up in the face of grim, stark realities like this. I reflect on yesterday's sermon on Jonah, in which the preacher firmly argued that, "Our disobedience is the world's catastrophe." Our failure-- and even refusal-- as the Church to engage a society that craves power, exploitation and literally cheap sex is disobedience. And it is catastrophe. Every individual actor in the sex trade screams for love, for ministry, for the light of Jesus. Of course we feel compassion for the women entering recovery. But what about the larger, frightening, disgusting system? Are some of them our Ninevites? The johns, the pimps, the gangs, the accomplices, the abusers who made that little girl feel unsafe? Imagine a world in which THEY were healed as well. Imagine a world where that resounding catastrophe could be replaced by hope.
It's a miracle, but one we've seen before: out of dark, wounded, belly-of-a-whale depths, hope comes.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Somethin's Happenin Here
(Praise God!)
For the first time in a while, I've been BUSY. Not pretend-busy, not finding things to do here and there, but legitemately, dawn-to-dusk (or mid-morning to late evening...) busy. It all started almost two weeks ago-- and yes, it's been an excuse for sparse blogging. I've continued meeting with people doing ministry here in the city, and those meetings have transitioned from lots of "Hi, What do you do?" conversations into "Let's talk more about ____" discussions. That is deeply reassuring and hopeful to me. Baby steps and opening doors.
Then, as blogged about last week, I spent a day in Ensenada, Mexico. The next day, I met up with a former Trek student (going to Mexico City this summer as Trek staff!) and then went into team meeting mode. Thursday through Saturday were Urban Mosaic meeting and training days, so the 4 other guys on our team with Geoff and me rolled in from Seattle and greater L.A. It was wonderful to finally put faces with names, to hang out, learn more about Appreciative Inquiry as a congregational change process, and grapple with team identity, purpose, and performance.
Yeah, that mouthful about congregational change appreciative WHAT? =) Basically, Appreciative Inquiry is a very intentionally positive way of going about change-- applicable to any institution. We see Biblical principles all over it, because it finds and affirms what is right and good in an organization (Philippians 4:8, as a relevant support). It's a lot like doing community development based on assets or evaluating a person by his/ her strengths. Fleshing out our reading with hands-on understanding and dialogue brought out the potential delights and difficulties of using the methodology in a church setting.
Then, after a day of sabbath rest, a new week roared into action with a day-long conference with Luis Palau CityFest folks, followed by some other good, God-infused meetings. And now it feels right to take a few days to stay on top of emails and administrative joys. Oh Lord, be my guide...!
For the first time in a while, I've been BUSY. Not pretend-busy, not finding things to do here and there, but legitemately, dawn-to-dusk (or mid-morning to late evening...) busy. It all started almost two weeks ago-- and yes, it's been an excuse for sparse blogging. I've continued meeting with people doing ministry here in the city, and those meetings have transitioned from lots of "Hi, What do you do?" conversations into "Let's talk more about ____" discussions. That is deeply reassuring and hopeful to me. Baby steps and opening doors.
Then, as blogged about last week, I spent a day in Ensenada, Mexico. The next day, I met up with a former Trek student (going to Mexico City this summer as Trek staff!) and then went into team meeting mode. Thursday through Saturday were Urban Mosaic meeting and training days, so the 4 other guys on our team with Geoff and me rolled in from Seattle and greater L.A. It was wonderful to finally put faces with names, to hang out, learn more about Appreciative Inquiry as a congregational change process, and grapple with team identity, purpose, and performance.
Yeah, that mouthful about congregational change appreciative WHAT? =) Basically, Appreciative Inquiry is a very intentionally positive way of going about change-- applicable to any institution. We see Biblical principles all over it, because it finds and affirms what is right and good in an organization (Philippians 4:8, as a relevant support). It's a lot like doing community development based on assets or evaluating a person by his/ her strengths. Fleshing out our reading with hands-on understanding and dialogue brought out the potential delights and difficulties of using the methodology in a church setting.
Then, after a day of sabbath rest, a new week roared into action with a day-long conference with Luis Palau CityFest folks, followed by some other good, God-infused meetings. And now it feels right to take a few days to stay on top of emails and administrative joys. Oh Lord, be my guide...!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)